I am an American Now

I guess I can claim to be a real American now since I have got that quintessential American trait: monolingualism. Just kidding.

But my language skills are getting worse. Especially in my native language, Urdu. I hadn’t written anything (yes, I mean anything) in Urdu since my college years, now more than a decade in the past. Then, recently I decided to switch this weblog to a bilingual one. Trying to write here in Urdu has been hard. And not just because I was typing in Urdu for the first time in my life. I have found that my Urdu writing skills are no longer adequate. My Urdu in these posts has been stilted and unnatural.

Mind you, I am not one of those yuppie Pakistanis who never learned adequate Urdu. We spoke Urdu at home. While I didn’t read as much Urdu literature as English, I read quite a bit, which is another thing that has changed. I haven’t read any Urdu literature recently (other than the few books, especially poetry, that I brought with me from Pakistan). Even though I have never been a great writer, I used to manage to write decent Urdu essays in high school.

Another thing that has changed is that in recent years most of my friends and acquaintances are not Pakistanis. Hence, the only person I regularly speak Urdu with is Amber. The same is true for her. Even with her, I have noticed that English is creeping into our conversation quite a lot. We seem to switch between English and Urdu all the time while talking to to each other.

On the internet, I read mostly the English Pakistani newspapers. I read Dawn regularly and The News on occasion. This is more due to the liberal nature of English journalism in Pakistan as compared to Urdu newspapers than any other factor.

My efforts to be multilingual (i.e., more than two languages) as an adult have been dismal failures. I tried to learn Arabic and Persian after high school and then French a few years ago. Sad to admit, but I am not a language person.

I think I need to work on my Urdu skills more regularly. So expect regular Urdu posts here. Also, I need to find some bookstore which carries good Urdu books.

Published
Categorized as Urdu

By Zack

Dad, gadget guy, bookworm, political animal, global nomad, cyclist, hiker, tennis player, photographer

7 comments

  1. you may want to check out alhamra’s website- they are some of the better urdu language publishers and have a decent web presence

  2. I can write urdu very well.

    But I am horrible at typing it. See typing Urdu is painstakingly slow and your ideas they move ahead of your hands.

    And I have seen that with time my typed Urdu is getting better as well.

  3. This is interesting. In my family I can see different attitudes towards language reflecting the political culture of the time; my grandparents’ generation saw virtually all of them in prison or underground during the Freedom movement as a result when they had children they refused to let them speak any English at home out of the prevailing strong atmosphere of nationalist at the time. My parents both tell me that they couldn’t even listen to any English Music or entertainment programmes at home; the only thing allowed to be listened to in English was the news, which in those days meant the BBC World Service. My parents, being the first post-colonial generation had a more relaxed attitude and let us speak what we wanted at home; though they always confined themselves to Hindi/Bengali, as a result of which we got a curious mish-mash when one of us would speak in English but get replies in Hindi and vice-versa. Visitors always found this very odd 😉 Though my Father speaks Urdu (and Farsi as well) he tried hard to make me learn, as he was an obsessive admirer of Urdu poetry but after already having to learn three different languages and scripts I was quite tired of having to learn another (not to mention the tediously long hours spent in listening to ghazal enthusiasts that would always flock around – worse than a cult these people I tell you) and so managed to always weasel out of this.

    In the current generation I have observed a fear by parents that their children especially abroad will grow up without really being fluent in their mother tongues; in India the problem is slightly different as most of my cousins’ children speak what can only be described as ‘Hinglish’ an odd mixture of demotic Hindi and choice phrases they have picked up from satellite – quite funny as they will start a sentence in English but finish it in Hindi. I think though that for yourself and Amber, you will have to make an effort to make sure that your children (ahem, note the plural lol 😉 retain Urdu as well as English, as this can be quite difficult to do from what I have seen here in the UK.

  4. cheesoo: Are you talking about this site? Seems reasonable.

    Jalal: I am not typing Urdu regularly enough for my typing speed to increase.

    Conrad: Very interesting.

    I need to meet your Dad then. Don’t worry, you can disappear while we talk Urdu poetry.

    for yourself and Amber, you will have to make an effort to make sure that your children (ahem, note the plural lol 😉 retain Urdu as well as English, as this can be quite difficult to do from what I have seen here in the UK.

    No plurals, ok?

    I agree it can be difficult. I know a few US-born kids of Pakistani parents who don’t speak Urdu at all. Others speak it with an American accent. Usually, they understand spoken Urdu but prefer to speak English. Most don’t have good reading or writing skills in Urdu though.

    It’ll require quite a bit of effort to teach my child Urdu. We would like to do it though. On the other hand, I am not like your grandparents for example and am reconciled with the fact that if my kid is born and raised in the US, he/she will use English much more than Urdu.

    I am worried about my own loss of Urdu skills though. Is it even possible to lose one’s first language?

  5. Usually, they understand spoken Urdu but prefer to speak English. Most don’t have good reading or writing skills in Urdu though.

    I think this is what is important; given the pre-literate state of most sections of society in South Asia; these are in any case very much oral cultures as opposed to written ones. One thing that strikes me about the English (by this I mean in the UK) approach to language learning is that there is too much emphasis on writing and reading and learning technical grammar and syntax – leaving oral and conversational skills relatively weaker and unexamined; which is sort of counter-productive when you think of it since most interactions in applied use will need these skills rather than written ones.

    It’ll require quite a bit of effort to teach my child Urdu. We would like to do it though.

    I think it is well worth the effort – for speaking and listening at least; writing probably less so.

    On the other hand, I am not like your grandparents for example and am reconciled with the fact that if my kid is born and raised in the US, he/she will use English much more than Urdu.

    Well, that was a different time period and place. It was during the transition to Independence and there was some resentment against Colonial modes of control particularly for those who had been subject to penal incarceration and other forms of brutality; there was also a desire to make a statement about cultural autonomy and freedom and carve out a self-assertive role for a national culture. It was quite a different time, as markers of nationalism people preferred to wear khadi, travel second-class etc. to be expected given the conditions of the time. I think it says a lot about the changing cultural politics that when looking back on family albums, one can see that for many middle-class urbanised Indians, most photographic representations in the early 20th century have the men all dressed in English Savile Row-style suits that Edwardian Gentlemen wore but after WWI and the 1920s all pictures have most wearing khadi kurtas and the top-hat has been exchanged for the Gandhi cap; what changed, of course was the arrival of mass politics and nationalism; which re-orientated the cultural and political relations between the periphery and the metropole. As the generations progressed things became more relaxed (as indeed did parenting norms) my parents generations were more sanguine and less concerned with maintaining such distinctions and by out time one can say complacency and hybridity has become the norm – which is a good thing, it shows that there is enough confidence to be able to flexibly incorporate new elements and allow change in new directions. This has of course produced a backlash, language has been a intensely political issue in UP with the saffronists whipping it up in a communal fashion to mobilise support. This has a slight diasporic echo, as the BJP’s World Hindi conference meetings show to try and prove that Hindi is somehow a ‘global’ language; ridiculous given that few would have spoken it some decades back; rather ironically the medals struck to commemorate one of these meets floundered when trying to get a figure of enough renown and appeal and they settled on Kabir, whose picture adorned these medallions distributed – not exactly what you would call a most suitable choice !!!!

    I am worried about my own loss of Urdu skills though. Is it even possible to lose one’s first language?

    I don’t think so; at least not orally, but then I don’t know what Urdu outlets there are in the US and I suspect things are easier for Hindi-speakers; here many cinemas now carry Bollywood films, Hindi newspapers are available on the net and in Indiatown shops and with satellite one can get Zee TV etc which makes things easier. I remember that my parents used to always bring back Amar Chitra Katha comics from India; which is a good way to keep a child’s interest in maintaining language skills. Most councils here have signs and literature distributed in Hindi, Bengali, Urdu and Gujarati and even the local TV broadcasts some Urdu programmes. I would imagine in the US, though the impact would be less visible on the mainstream and official channels of media-dissemination, the diversity on offer in the private marketplace would allow a lot of material to be available. The main difference I would imagine is one of public attitudes; in the UK due to its official multi-cultural politics and mode of acculturation there is a greater live-and-let-live approach to cultural and social integration (which can be bad in that it leads to shallow commercialism and ghettoisation) but allows more freedom and less pressure for forcible assimilation; I don’t know what the situation is like in the US. The difference is that there is a much greater impact of Indian culture and language on British life – some cockney slang has now appropriated terms like ‘pukka’ etc. so there is a greater familiarity that makes things easier – though it can also breed a level of condescension as well.

  6. I have been living in Pakistan all my life … never been to America, and even I cant write proper Urdu, which ofcourse is nothing to be proud of… but i know what you mean. Its kinda sad actually.
    I was doing an assignment for college on “Urdu Media” when i came across your post. It was quite interesting to read. Keep practicing!

  7. I have been raised in U.S. since i was 12. I am writing an essay on diversity and how i am a unique Pakistani American who stands out from others, and what i have learned from my experiences. I was having trouble coming up with some stuff, its funny how all these thoughts cross your mind, but when you actually sit down to write, your mind goes blank. Maybe you can share some of your experiences on diversity so i can get some ideas. Please feel free to email me if you get a chance

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